Hi and welcome to this forum invisaligngirl!
Firstly ... have you consulted with some orthodontists' to find out if you are a suitable candidate for invisalign? If you have, many of your questions should have been answered and since they haven't, I recommend you phone the ortho's you consulted with and ask these questions, as this will help you.
I've never had invisalign, but I work with two orthodontist's who have patients with either total invisalign or a mix of ibraces/invisalign or ceramic brackets/invisalign. I don't have a lot of experience with invisalign, but here's what I've been able to pick up while working with these people and their patients.
Weight loss - this is definitely avoidable and should be discouraged. Eating well three times a day, with snacks inbetween (usually three) is not difficult with invisalign, it just requires a committed level of hygiene care. The aligners do need to be removed and your teeth and the aligners cleaned after you eat. Sometimes after a snack, a good wash with water will be sufficient, but this isn't the case if you have food stuck between your teeth, or you were eating/drinking foods with high sugar content.
Some people report weight loss, then when talking with them, you find they can't be bothered removing the aligners and cleaning their teeth. In the words of my orthos', this is a lazy behaviour and they need to rethink why they're paying so much money to have their teeth straightened, if they're not going to take care of their health.
If teeth are tender due to moving, there are many soft alternatives, that are healthy/enjoyable and will not cause you to loose weight. Think about what soft foods you eat now and make sure you have them available for any days that your teeth may feel a little achy. For most invisalign wearers, this seems to happen most the day or two following the changing of aligners. We recommend changing aligners before you go to bed, that way your teeth have a night to get used to them.
It is highly recommended that you do not eat or drink with aligners in. We have patients who drink plain water, and that appears to be fine, but no hot drinks or drinks with sugar or acid (fruit drinks). The aligners cloud easily, and this defeats one of the main reasons that patients choose invisalign. The aligners can also tear, break, and change shape if they come into contact with hot fluids.
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Why do you have to leave the aligners out while eating? if it has nothing to do with the effectiveness of the aligners, then ill take that chance..
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Eating with aligners may affect there effectiveness and this defeats the purpose of using invisalign.
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another worry is when i have to shave my teeth down..
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Interproximal Reduction -
IPR - is the term used to shave between teeth. I've had this done twice and for me it was painfree and done quickly. If only a small amount of space is needed, this is a much better way to get that space, than by extraction teeth. General the amount shaved is only small, due to the amount of enamel available having to be considered.
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i worry if i become lazy in the future with retaining my teeth, that i will have spaces where there was none before..
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I recommend that while you're thinking this is a possibility, please don't have orthodontic treatment. Retainer wear is for life ... usually only one or two nights a week, but this is a commitment you need to make before beginning treatment.
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how do u know when to change the aligners? even though they say two weeks, i worry about the infamous root resorption, that ive heard can happen... i want to make sure i am not changing them too frequently.. i was thinking that i might move my aligners a couple days after two weeks, just to be on the safe side.. if i do this, will this cause any problems, other than delaying the process?
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Your orthodontist will tell you how often you need to change aligners, and this is what will be recommended for you to make sure your teeth are cared for. If your orthodontist says to change your aligners fortnightly, and you decide to wear them longer, this will delay your treatment and affect your orthodontist appointments. Please talk to your ortho about your concerns, as root reabsorption can be a problem for some people.
It's great you have so many questions, but disappointing if you've consulted with some orthodontists' and these have not been addressed. Please continue to post any concerns you have.
Your questions make me grateful I wasn't a suitable candidate for invisalign!