mark clayson

Last week I went for yet another appointment with the orthodontist. They have seen me so much that they don't even expect me to give my name - they just point to a chair and mutter "sit there and keep quiet". I put an order in for my favourite magazines but as yet the request has not been fulfilled - but I know they are busy.

So, back to last week. Half expecting and half not. Was that the day to go into braces? Sadly no. I had 5 molar bands put on - a lot of pushing, pulling and shoving, a funny taste and a couple more separators and that was it. I kinda like all this stalling as I feel I am getting value for money. The molar bands were not too much of a problem but I was advised to come back today for a further fitting.

So, in I go and he says:

"You ready Mark?"

(what do you mean am I ready, I've been ready for 7 months)

"Ready for what?"

(I was playing it cool....)

"We are fitting your braces today"

(he was always the joker)

"You are kidding"

(I was always the joker)

"No. Today is the day"


And he was RIGHT. Today WAS the day. A bit of humping, lifting, squirting, squirming and rubbing and the braces were well and truly ON!

As I write this I have had no pain but it is only 4 hours gone. I have taken my precautionary painkillers and am trying to drink a bit more. Tonight I will have a few extra beers to celebrate.

I have taken some "before" photos and I will upload them sometime. I warn you - it is NOT a pretty sight.

My journey has now started. Here, also, starts my moaning.